Deserving

Sometimes I feel so undeserving of these two.

I can be such a grumpy mom.
I just got done with my first official week of full-time work.
Tuesday-Saturday 9-4, hopefully this doesn't last too long.
I was so grumpy and edgy with them.
Then Joey came up to me and said "mom, I love you." And gave me a big hug!
I felt like poo.
I am constantly apologizing to them and asking for their patience,
and they are always willing to offer forgiveness and love.
I am so thankful for them in my life and count them as BLESSINGS!

OA

This was on the OA Website... I found it a little humorous so I wanted to share.

Are You a Compulsive Overeater?

This series of questions may help you determine if you are a compulsive eater.

1. Do you eat when you’re not hungry?
2. Do you go on eating binges for no apparent reason?
3. Do you have feelings of guilt and remorse after overeating?
4. Do you give too much time and thought to food?
5. Do you look forward with pleasure and anticipation to the time when you can eat alone?
6. Do you plan these secret binges ahead of time?
7. Do you eat sensibly before others and make up for it alone?
8. Is your weight affecting the way you live your life?
9. Have you tried to diet for a week (or longer), only to fall short of your goal?
10. Do you resent others telling you to “use a little willpower” to stop overeating?
11. Despite evidence to the contrary, have you continued to assert that you can diet “on your own” whenever you wish?
12. Do you crave to eat at a definite time, day or night, other than mealtime?
13. Do you eat to escape from worries or trouble?
14. Have you ever been treated for obesity or a food-related condition?
15. Does your eating behavior make you or others unhappy?

Have you answered yes to three or more of these questions? If so, it is probable that you have or are well on your way to having a compulsive eating problem. We have found that the way to arrest this progressive disease is to practice the Twelve-Step recovery program of Overeaters Anonymous. Overeaters Anonymous is a fellowship of individuals who, through shared experience, strength and hope, are recovering from compulsive overeating. We welcome everyone who wants to stop eating compulsively. There are no dues or fees for members; we are self-supporting through our own contributions, neither soliciting nor accepting outside donations. OA is not affiliated with any public or private organization, political movement, ideology or religious doctrine; we take no position on outside issues. Our primary purpose is to abstain from compulsive overeating and to carry this message of recovery to those who still suffer.

Is OA for You?

Only you can decide that question. No one else can make this decision for you. We who are now in OA have found a way of life which enables us to live without the need for excess food. We believe that compulsive eating is a progressive illness, one that, like alcoholism and some other illnesses, can be arrested. Remember, there is no shame in admitting you have a problem; the most important thing is to do something about it.

I am going to give it a shot... My clients right now are all expected to attend Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), Cocaine Anonymous (CA), Marijuana Anonymous (MA) etc. so I am going to give OA a shot.

My Class

These guys were all amazing, fun, understanding, funny, hardworkers, cute, and the best cohort I could have imagined to spend the last 20 months with.Thanks MSW Class of 2010!
LYLAS, love ya like a sister.

Self Control

Why do I struggle so much to control what I eat?
I eat when I am stressed and I think it makes me feel better but I know I would feel SO much better in the stress if I was eating healthy.
When I eat healthy I don't feel fat, bloated, chubby, overweight, and my clothes are not too tight. When I tell people I am going to eat better I eat worse, so it does not help if I ask for tons of support, I have to decide for myself and then do it myself.
It would be nice to have someone to call when I feel weak and know that they will support me by reminding me to eat healthy i.e. carrots, celery, fruit, water... but in reality I just need some self- control.
I went to the Dr. yesterday for a check-up and had to step on that scale... crap!!! I am done with school now so that stress should be gone, but now I am working full time so there is that added stress, plus we have to move because our landlords are not going to be renting this house anymore (their granddaughter needs a place to stay). No matter what, there is always going to be some stress, so that is no longer an excuse!!!

I know I am beautiful and weight does not matter, but it is important to eat healthy and feel healthy, and treat our bodies like the temples they are, plus it hurts to run cuz I'm so chubby.

Help me out, please, (my face is showing the chubbiness) what do you do?

Perfect Day

I do not know why I share such intimate experiences on this blog... I guess it is because I hope that it will help someone else, it is a cute way to "journal" these events, and I can write it better than saying it.

Soooo here you go.

As I was getting ready for the day, the day after my graduation, I was full of gratitude for all I have been given, then this random thought came into my mind... the one thing that would've made my graduation day even more perfect would have been to have my dad there.
Every big event my family has had since my dad passed away I have always had very strong impressions that my dad was there. The mornings both of my boys were born I had overwhelming feelings of peace and comfort knowing that my dad was with me.
When all of my siblings left and came home from their missions, and got married I had similar impressions. Whenever I need it most I'll see a UPS truck or see my 'Uncle' Don who calls me "Roo", a nick name from my dad.
As graduation approached I knew I would get the feeling that he was there and he was proud of me and I was waiting for it.
My mom made the comment that now he has his BYU grad and I knew that he was proud, the ring my mom gave me was from my dad for her, so I knew that he was in on the gift with her, but I still had not received that special feeling that comes only from him and the spirit, and Saturday morning after graduation I got it.
I had this overwhelming feeling that he was there with me and he was proud, the tears just flowed and flowed and flowed. I am so thankful for the tender mercies of our loving Father in Heaven who at moments allows the veil to be thin enough for us to feel the presence of those who have passed on.
In church yesterday I was overcome with gratitude at the love of our Father who helps us through trials and struggles only to make us stronger, better people. I know I could not have completed the last two years without some special help from above. I am grateful to know that I am a better person for sticking with it and trusting in the Lord, counting on Him in times of need.

I like this pic of the boys in their flip flops so I wanted to include it.

I love this guy too! I love that we are growing old and chubby together :)
I know I had so much help from so many earthly angels so many that I could not name them all, we have had such a great ward, a great landlord, great neighbors, wonderful friends, terrific classmates, amazing professors and mentors, and the best family EVER!
The past 20+ months have been so life changing for me that I may just randomly post about them for the next little while. Thank you for bearing with me and still following my blog.
Love you and Thank you!!!

Princess

Today I felt like a Princess.

The past two days I have felt spoiled.
I have a whole lot of gratitude!
It all started with attending Convocation Thursday with my classmates, listening to Elder Christopherson, of the quorum of the 12 apostles, speak.
The weather was beautiful, the talks were amazing and the spirit has been so strong.
My mom, sis, cousin, nephew, mom and dad-in-law all came up from St. G and we went to dinner at Outback Steakhouse Thursday evening.

I told my mom last year that when she died this ring was all I wanted. Ever since I was a kid I would see her wearing it and I loved it. Well, she had it sized to fit me and cleaned and she gave it to me for graduation! I love it!

I told Dave I wanted this pic for Graduation and Mothers Day and he and his parents got it for me for graduation. YAY! It is gorgeous, it is called Men of Galilee, and it reminds me of my boys. I hope someday they will see it as a reminder to be "Men of Galilee".

We had waffles and eggs for breakfast Friday morning after I worked for two hours and did some yoga. Then my sis did my hair and I was off to graduation/punch and cookies with my momma.
It was so fun to have my mom there with me because I was able to introduce her to many people (Professors and classmates) that have been influential in my life these past 20 months. She was like my own personal camera crew because she would take pics whenever I asked her to of me and my friends.

Friday after graduation we went to lunch at the very delicious Burger Supreme in Provo. If you have not been there you need to try it, mmmm delish.

I love my boys!

Me and My BFF Silene!
I totally appreciate the love and support I have been given throughout the past two years. Many people were here this weekend and many others called and offered their love and congrats today as well. I am so blessed!
These are some of my supporters. Love you!
Me and my hubby with the Y behind us. Love him, I truly could not have done this without him, he deserved that stole of gratitude.
Kaden, my cuz and I.
Yay, totally excited to be done. Mom, me and sis.
Dave and I finished off the night by attending the Jazz game with Brendon and Tess. The Jazz beat the Nuggets in an awesome playoff game!
I could go on and on... I could post more and more photos, I had my personal camera crew, remember... For now I'll stop, but I'll post more later.
Thank you all for helping me feel so important, special and loved, I owe all I have to our Father in Heaven. I am so grateful for the blessings He has given me.
I truly feel like a princess.

Announcement

So this is what I get when I scan on my scanner and our computer is funky so I cannot edit it.These are the announcements I made with the photo shoot photos. I sent some to Aunts, Uncles, and Grandparents so if you are not one of those you get this. :) Love ya!

Commencement

Thursday April 22, 2010

4:00 PM Marriott Center

Social Work Graduation Reception

Friday April 23, 2010

12:00-1:00 PM

Mary Lou Fulton Plaza (JFSB Courtyard)

Convocation

Friday April 23, 2010

2:00 PM Marriott Center

If any of you are in the area and would like to attend please feel free to. Also, I want to thank all of our family and friends for their love and support, we could not have done this without you! Since getting these photos taken I have had several people ask me why Dave is not in them. I simply thought it would be a cute announcement if it was from the boys, because they truly are so excited for me to graduate and to have their momma back a little. Dave is proud of this accomplishment as well, but that was not my idea.